Steroids

Well, I'm back on Prednisone. I'm actually on it for my allergies (my husband and I went on a long hike, and the allergens jumped at the chance to attack), but I'm slightly relieved because my joints have been aching. Specifically, the joints in my hands and feet. They throb when I wake in the morning. They fill uncomfortably when I run--like the blood pumped to them is unable to return to my heart.

But Prednisone is not without it's many side effects. For starters, I get so irritable on it. Whenever I am on it, I joke about my "roid rage." I'm ashamed to admit that my horribly grumpy behavior has been hard on my husband. I was so uncontrolably angry yesterday--his birthday--and I fear that I may have made his birthday a bit unpleasant. I didn't mean to--I really just couldn't control myself at all. I feel awful about it, and he's been so understanding. But I find it horrifying how I behave when I'm on this medicine. I just go a bit mad. But it works. It works well.

It also works well for weight gain--another side effect that I hate. In the last 40 hours, I have gained 8 pounds. Most of this weight came from the birthday cupcakes that I just couldn't stop eating. I wasn't even hungry--Prednisone just gives me this uncontrollable urge to eat everything in the kitchen. I even ate foods that I hate and, under normal conditions, will not touch. I devoured some sort of mystery meat and a lot of salami. I couldn't stand either one, but I had to eat them. It's horrifying. And it really upsets my stomach. When I eat things that my stomach isn't used to (e.g., red meat), my stomach punishes me for it.

But Prednisone helps keep my eyes from swelling shut during allergy season, and it relieves a lot of my daily Lupus pain and inflammation. And sometimes, just sometimes, those pros outweigh the cons.